Jack-isms (and Sam-isms Too)

Jack says the funniest stuff these days. It is just because he is so grown up sounding. Oftentimes I will think I am going to write something on my blog that he says, but it just is not as funny if you cannot hear the WAY he says things. So matter-of-factly, as if he is the authority on all things.

He got moved to an advanced reading group, and as I have been sort of waiting for this, I was very curious about it. The only way to get any info from him is to ask VERY specific questions, which he loves.

So I was asking him all about it...

..."And then how do you go to your new library class?"

"Well, Mrs. Someone comes to our door, and says 'Jack and Camryn, right this way!' and then we stand up, holding hands, and walk to the library."

I mean, it is hard not to crack up and this stuff. You can just see the mental picture. As always, you are NOT allowed to laugh at anything he says or he gets deeply offended.

In the same conversation...

..."Do you know any of these other children in the class that come from the other Kindergarten classes?"

"Well, there are only six."

"Do you know them?"

"No"

"Are their any other boys in there?"

Long, pensive pause. You have to retain utter silence during these pauses or he once again gets angry.

"Well, mommy. I am not trying to tease about this. There is a boy in there but he really looks like a girl."

"Well, that is o.k. I realize you aren't trying to tease, and it is o.k. to say to your mommy, just try not to say it to him, though, because that would really hurt his feelings."

I mean, seriously? He is five! How does he come up with this stuff?

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Sam was taking a bath in 'Jack's bathtub' the other night, as opposed to ours, where he usually bathes. Reason being I was washing dishes and then I could still see him, but obviously not well enough. I walk back in there and water is all over the floor.

"Sam! Did you do this? Pouring water out of the bath is not nice! That is not for good boys, it is for bad boys!"

He jumps down, then dashes off and says "I a bad boy, mommy!"